No news here.
Parents use kids. My dad did. If my mom had ever wanted to leave, and I
remember one big fight. He threatened to keep the kids. She had no money. No
power. No help. She couldn’t support the kids or hire a lawyer.
He threw it all in
her face and made it very clear. It was his way or no way.
Wow….what an a$$.
Sorry, the truth hurts sometimes. These aren’t divorced parents. They were
married for 41 years.
My sister was in
tears during that fight. I told her over and over mom wasn’t leaving. I’m only
3 ½ years older but it’s funny how with one kid, adults a lot of times forget
kids listen to everything. I knew more. Had seen more. The parents hide it
better later but I already knew. Mom had no alternatives. She wouldn’t leave
her kids and dad got his way.
I feel bad. i feel
guilty because she deserved a lot better than the way dad treated her. the way
he modeled for us to treat people. He was so different in public than in
private. It makes me sick to go that far back in my mind…no wonder I escaped
into books.
Even historically,
at least women were respected in some times. The regency era…Jane austen. It
seemed like women were at least treated well but they couldn’t earn their own
money or be independent. And they were ruled by their father, husband, son or
even brother…they needed a man. So it was all manners…fake respect?
I guess there has
never been a good time to be a woman. Maybe being overweight was a way to keep men away since I don't have good examples (first hand). Maybe food is just comfort? Of course I'd like the right guy but being financially independent--able to walk away if the guy turns into a jerk--that's critical.
We should all be able to take care of ourselves because if we CAN'T, then others can and may take advantage of it. I'm sure not all men are bad and not all women are good. Each of us suffers from our own intense up-close experiences
